"B-Minus Average" a poem by Jess Coffman

The "B+" on my "True Happiness" Test that I got today, make me think of a poem I wrote several years ago called "B-minus Average." At that point in my life I was blocked creatively and romantically and couldn't imagine getting anything in life that I wanted. 

B minus average

a B minus average is how I feel each day,

Not the best, not the worst, just making it okay.

And everyday I wake up with the will to be an A,

But sometime after coffee my ambition fades away.

I'm twenty-five, and most do say, 

"stop stressing out you'll find your way.

You've had some wins and in little time,

you'll change the world through rhythms and rhyme."

But all I see are others who, are doing what I want to do.

They're all nineteen and so far ahead,

It makes me just want to stay in bed.

But my greatest fear is taking a shot, 

Working hard and risking a lot.

To find I'm just an average girl, 

Who gave this singing thing a whirl.

Who never "had it" after all,  

Who never broke the rejection wall.

Never proved better than the rest, 

Never proved I was the best.

Years later my belly is out to my feet,

Life is predictable, peaceful and sweet.

Yet there is a pulling at my chest, 

To abandon my reality and leave my nest.

To take stupid chances like never before,

When I was scared to even open the door.