"My Darlings," a poem by Jess Coffman

Your Music resounds within me, 

Swirling Lavender, pulsing Soul.

It transforms old faces into new, 

It buries roots,

building Harmony,

Making Whole. 

Your powerful voice thunders through me,

Sighs of longing, escape under the sun. 

You have melted the numbness,

Surrounding my heart.

And my heart you have expertly won. 

You are stunningly beautiful, under the lights.

Your magnificence is wild.

I catch your smile in the air, 

And it makes me giddy like a child. 

You helped me give a gift, on the wind.

We blew it out together like a wish.

We whispered love into their ears,

We offered a choice,

In the face of their fears.

We shook them with laugher, 

And moved them to tears. 

We offered them change,

In the face of their years. 

We have opened our arms to their hiding.

A “Welcome Home!”

Forever on our lips.

A Reawakening,

might be a souvenir,

Where the adventures are epic,

And the wine drips. 

There is always newness to discover,

Someone or something, to bring back to life.

With a pioneer’s heart you’ll uncover, 

A focused fluidity,

Imbibed in the pioneer’s strife. 

With shameless and fierce curiosity, 

We seek the rocks to build our foundation.

And with Spirits full of excitement, 

We nurtured a freeing love, and collaboration. 

To call you my friend is an Honor.

To be a Child with you, 

A Gift.

You’re forever written in my story,

However long, however swift. 

There is magic infused within our bones, 

Pure euphoria, beats with our blood.

We’ve transcended the likely story.

We’ve danced among trees,

And played in the mud. 

We’ve created happiness together,

Cause you have seen me, 

with Knowing eyes.

And with palms Overflowing with color,

You’ll paint over dreary goodbyes. 

I’ll let go of you, masterful and shining,

Cause we know with whom we belong.

And tomorrow, I’ll hum the sweet melody,

Of the hope we aroused with our song. 

JESS COFFMAN

"My Darlings," was written to honor some beautiful friends that I made while performing for Transcendence Theatre Company. The cast, crew and musicians that inspired this poem, were from our Fantastical Family Night show, that just ended last weekend. On our first day of rehearsal, our brave leader Amy Miller, perched on a wooden picnic bench, under knowing oak trees, and asked us all to tell the group why were were excited to work for the company. 

Most people said, something along the lines of "because I get to be with my tribe," or "the nature here is stunning," or "I need to recharge away from NYC, to remember why I love performing." Whatever the reason, people come to Sonoma to work for Transcendence, and they fall in love. They fall in love with other like-minded individuals, they fall in love with nature, they fall in love their craft, or they fall in love with themselves. The air is so clean, it's like food for the lungs, the wine is flowing and the generosity here from the community, is endless and inspiring. 

I know that I get to be the best version of myself here, that is the reason I am always excited to work for Transcendence. I get to keep the harmony within myself. The "mother wolf," inside gets to nurture, the child gets to explore and frolic and the growing artist gets to work. I am my most calm here, my most fed, my most actualized. 

Thank-you to everyone in my Fantastical Family Night cast, who help me be a fuller version of myself. It was so fun to play with you. I am honored by your love and talent. May you keep listening to your inner child, always. 

Peace, Treasures and Green Kazoos,

Your Jess 

"Suffocation," a poem by Jess Coffman

It's as though the air has been sucked out. 

vacuum sealed, without space for 

mistakes or creativity,

squeezed tight, without freedom 

or grace. 

Regret all over my face. 

But with determined eyes to be "right"

Having lost sight of the gratitude.

Lying flat, and suffocating

With a mask of resilience, 

I stay stuck. 

Fucked, by my own stubbornness

and self preservation.

I take a deep breath 

and blow the plastic protection 

surrounding me, 

away from my lips,

pushing air out and through 

what feels like an inflexible balloon. 

Labored breath, and with frustration,

I try with all of my will, to create 

a bubble of understanding.

It's so difficult, even though 

I want desperately for it to be easy.

Exhausted, I just stop.

almost without choice, 

I stop pushing.

I rest.

I close my eyes and give into the squeeze, 

but instead of feeling claustrophobic,

I allow my limbs wrapped 

around myself, to feel like a

full body hug. 

I relax into the tightness.

As my heart beat slows,

my breath is calm and shallow.

An inner warmth felt like the 

eye contact held with an infant, 

melts the imprisoning armor around me. 

As it falls, peeling away the impurities 

of my guilt and frustration,

I feel a birthing.

A chance at new choices,

a cleansed and free body.

When I open my eyes, 

he is 

still there,

looking fresh and new too.

Tentatively, we each 

take a step toward one another.

Recognizing the other's ready and 

listening spirit. 

With steady heart beats in alignment

we gracefully navigate,

through the summer wildflowers, to the 

Trees of Life. 

JESS COFFMAN

 Hello Dear Friend! 

Thank-you so much for reading "Suffocation." It was a poem I could help but write, after an argument I had the previous night, with someone I truly care about. Though we didn't end the conversation in anger, we also couldn't end it with a hug either, due to being in two separate places. When I woke in the morning, I felt as though I had an emotional hangover, which was a feeling I hadn't felt in a very long time, possibly never. So though I should have been focusing on learning new music at work, I split my attention and wrote at the same time. In my experience, when emotions meet inspiration, it is an unstoppable force that compels me to write, and I don't allow anything to prevent me from accomplishing the piece of work that is trying to be born. This is why I always carry around a journal, pen and phone, ready for when inspiration comes whispering in my ear and knocking on my heart. 

Peace, Whispers and Trees of Life, 

Your Jess

(P.S. The photo of the marble sculpture above was created by Belgian artist George Minne, in the late 1800's. The name of the sculpture is "Adolescent I," and is meant to depict the emotions and posture of self-protection and defiance, as well as shame and anguish. I was so uncomfortably moved by this sculpture, when I saw it at the Getty Museum in Los Angeles. I feel like it is a perfect representation of the way that I felt during my emotional hangover. 

The photo of the beautiful sunnies, was taken at the Sonoma Ashram. As I was looking up at them, they seemed to look down on me with a curious and knowing presence. I loved it.)