Elizabeth Lesser's Ted Talk: "Take 'The Other' to Lunch

This morning, I was pleased to have watched Elizabeth Lesser’s TED talk entitled “Take ‘The Other’ to Lunch.” The talk began with her speaking of how she has always struggled with the two very different extremes that exist within her: the Mystic and the Warrior. She admits that she has always been attracted to those people who devote their lives to humanity with “the grit of the warrior and the grace of the mystic.” She identifies a few of these mystic warriors as Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Theresa and Nelson Mandela.

Lesser then explains her critique of American people in regard to politics, both Democratics and Republicans. She says that we have become a nation of “Otherizing,” which she describes as when people of a specific ideology, identify those with contrary beliefs as wrong and unlike themselves in nature. Lesser says that the “worst eras in human history, they start with negative ‘Otherizing’ and then they morph into violent extremism.” The Nazi regime is a horribly successful example of how Hitler used “Otherizing” to manipulate the masses into thinking that those unlike themselves were not worth basic human rights, which let the slaughter of many “Others.” This of course this is the extreme, but it all started with a lack of mutual respect, which escalated into horrific violence. This lack of mutual respect, lack of understanding and “Otherizing” is seen all over the media in the way that Democrats and Republicans regard the other currently in America.

Lesser challenges Democrats and Republicans to make simple sincere efforts to get to know one another on a personal level. She suggests the initiative of “take the other to lunch.” A person “whose lifestyle frightens you or whose point of view makes smoke come out of your ears,” is precisely the person Lesser suggests that you take to lunch. She says that the goal of this effort is to get to  know one person from a group that you have negatively stereotyped in order to do away with “Otherizing.”

Being a “Democratic Mystic Warrior” herself, Lesser invited a staunch Republican woman out to lunch to test out her own theory. Before they met up for lunch they did agree on some ground rules that would help them to stick to their goal while meeting. They agreed to be curious, real, conversational and open listeners. They also agreed not to interrupt or persuade the other, or use defensive language while lunching. They found that though their differences remained, the negative stereotypes that exist in the media about the other side's character, did not prove to be true. They left their lunch with the aim to no longer participate in the belief of these negative stereotypes and to actively dispel it within their political communities. 

Growing up with an outspoken merciless Right-Winger for a Dad, I always felt very nervous to find out that my belief system was different from his. Though I knew that he was apart of the extreme, so I always took his "Otherizing" with a grain of salt. When I started doing Musical Theatre, I was introduced to the injustices and prejudices that exist in regard to homosexual rights in this country. My social beliefs tend to favor a liberal ideology, but again I have been turned off by "Otherizing" from my artistic Democratic friends as well. 

My problem has always been the fact that we have only two political parties and I am stuck in the middle. How can it be that we have endless choices regarding ice cream, cars and toothpaste and only two different types of political ideology to identify with? 

My hope is that Elizabeth Lesser's agenda will help to lessen the drama and defamatory statements causing "Otherizing" so we can appreciate and respect one another for our differences. As Noble Peace Prize winner and teacher of Ubuntu, Desmond Tutu said "Differences are not intended to separate, to alienate. We are different precisely in order to realize our need of one another."

 Enjoy Elizabeth Lesser's Ted Talk: "Take 'The Other' to Lunch"

http://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_lesser_take_the_other_to_lunch.html